Trust

Trust is not something I have given a lot of thought to in my life.

But recent events have forced me into some prolonged ruminations.

I think I am quite a trusting person, some might even say naive.

I tend towards the gullible, not seeing any obvious reason for people to lie, exaggerate, or deceive.

As a rule, I trust my friends and family to have my best interests at heart, I trust partners to be faithful and honest, I trust shopkeepers not to rip me off, and I trust my government to do its best for the welfare of my fellow citizens (there’s some naivete right there!).

And trust is a two-way contract. My friends no doubt expect me to look out for them, my family quite rightly expect that I will always do my best to love and care for them.

But what happens when trust breaks down? When a previously harmonious relationship, marked by seemingly mutual trust, is sullied by the failure of one party to honour their half of the contract?

Well, my reaction can be measured in stages: anger, an eruption of cynicism, and now sadness.

I hope this situation can be resolved, that trust can be restored. We’ll see, I guess. For now, I am looking at this as a learning curve. I always knew that people have an extraordinary capacity for deviousness. I just wasn’t used to being on the receiving end of it.

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7 Responses to “Trust”


  1. 1 Frederik Cordes September 2, 2007 at 11:06 am

    It’s fascinating how entire systems are built up around trust. One of the most interesting books written on the subject come from Niklas Luhmann – the book is called “Vertrauen – ein Mechanismus der Reduktion sozialer Komplexität” (Trust – a mechanism to reduce social complexity).

    Read more here:
    http://www.valt.helsinki.fi/staff/jjalava/trust_or_confidence.htm

  2. 2 Paul September 2, 2007 at 5:32 pm

    Frederik’s comments remind me of the German saying “Vertrauen is gut, Kontrolle ist besser”. Personally I’d prefer it to be the other way around, and I think you would too, Aaron.

    I hope the people who prompted your post read your blog. Is there a law against defamation in Denmark?

    For those who don’t speak German: “Trust is good, checks and controls are better”.

  3. 3 aaron78 September 2, 2007 at 7:24 pm

    Hehe, not sure Paul…but I guess we’d be talking more about slander in this case.

    At any rate, I don’t intend to let it affect me. Onwards and upwards, as my gran always used to say.

  4. 4 Agata September 4, 2007 at 10:08 am

    Some lyrics quoted from the song “Trust” from Gravenhurst:

    “Trust is a hard thing to come by these days
    and you have no idea just how it will feel until it happens for real
    you have no idea how bad it will feel until it happens for real”

    http://www.myspace.com/gravenhurst

    Take care

  5. 5 tim September 4, 2007 at 8:09 pm

    you can only trust people to be who they are and do what they do… it hurts sometimes.

  6. 6 sarika staflund ramlöv September 6, 2007 at 2:24 pm

    Hi there, just a comment/ question that came to my mind after reading your contribution; is it cynical/arrogant to claim that you can only trust people to a certain point!? Fx it is proven several times that people in emegency situations (catastropes, war etc.)acts unbelievable selfish, can you afford even to trust your best friend? I learned throughout life always to be careful what people say or do;please, this it does not mean that i have major trust issues.I know we all have had our share of distrust and one can´t measure with another. Any opinions bout my comment/question?


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